The Things They Carried, On the Rainy River

On the Rainy River is a personal narrative of a man who receives a letter from the U.S. drafting department. He is a scholar with high marks and a promising future who becomes faced with a dilemma of moral obligation versus the call of duty. He is a self proclaimed Liberal. At the arrival of this letter he is out of school for the summer working at a slaughterhouse for swine. He comes from a loving family with good morals and values. He has a fondness of being American.
Time has passed in his response to the letter and he begins having thoughts that teeter between going to war and the consequences of running away from everything. His mind is consumed by his reasons as well as his senses of his summer job. Anxiety takes control when he flees the slaughterhouse to return home and pack, he packs leaving only a vague note for his parents. He drives toward the border of Canada and discovers an inn where an old man took him in, no questions asked. Here with each passing day he uncovers within him the courage to go to war, but finds he is a coward in running from it.
There is a sense of bravery when one enlists in our armed forces, but for those who had no other alternative it is a struggle of personal and public scrutiny. Many had to choose love of country over value of life in order to not be chastised by their fellow man. Most take the journey of self-discovery during their service, but for O'Brien he followed the path of self-doubt before uncovering his destiny. Little boys are brought up to believe they shouldn’t cry and even more so in those days. O’Brien even states, “I tried to swallow it back, I tried to smile, except I was crying. Now, perhaps, you can understand why I’ve never told this story before.” (O’Brien) Even as an adult now he believes a man shouldn’t cry. Even in the field of battle there is a phantom rule that emotions must be kept under control. Anger and frustration are accepted, but fear and doubt have no place on a battlefield. It is do or die, kill or be killed. O’Brien concludes, “I survived, but it’s not a happy ending. I was a coward. I went to war.” (O’Brien) Here is a testimony of personal versus societal demands.